(08/01/12)
I had told myself I would continue to update my blog regularly - which hasn't happend seeing as the last time I did a blog was in October !! =O
Well, ALOT has happend since then - ALOT ! So, to begin with, I still have not heard back from the rheumatologist department - its now January 2012, so maybe I ought to really chase them up. It just involves a phone call which I don't like doing....Maybe I'll just get someone else to do it for me.
Secondly my hours have been cut down at work because, quite frankly, I was struggling - So i've gone from doing 18hours a week to 12hours =( Admittedly it has helped alot, as I do one full day and 2 afternoons a week, the afternoons make life so much easier as I can wake up on my own accord in the mornings. However, at first it put me in a frustrated, depressed state. Im 20 years old, therefore I should be working full time with ridiculous hours - and be allowed to complain about it. So less hours obviously means less money, less money means less retail therapy, less retail therapy means a very grumpy Francesca! In all seriousness I have bills to pay like everyone else, so I got told about Income Support, Im working under 16hours pw therefore I should be eligible right? Wrong, because Im not a single Mother nor pregnant etc im not eligible for it at all. Brilliant !! Although I got told I could apply for job seekers allowance instead, but, I have a job - a job that I love with colleagues that are understanding and caring, which I am bloody lucky for, so no, I do not want to leave my job to apply for another and be stuck somewhere making myself even more ill and hating the hell out of it, Back to square one I go.
So things get a little worse when I start suffering with sickness, headaches/migraines, my temp going up and down like a blimming yo-yo and feeling so exhausted and tired, I couldn't even get into work or they sent me home = Less Money. Yay! =( Had an inkling for quite a while and decided to pluck the courage up and get a home pregnancy test. It came up positive. I was indeed pregnant. Mixture of emotions overwhelmed me, I made an appointment at the doctors who congratulated me and gave me a prescription for folic acid and told me a midwife would contact me soon. It was worked out I was 7-8weeks gone. Wednesday I experienced some bleeding which obviously panicked and scared the hell out of me. I phoned my doctor who gave me a hospital number to ring to get in touch with a midwife who then rang me back, after explaining everything she said it was either nothing, could be normal or I was in the beginning stages of a miscarriage and to do a pregnancy test the following Monday. If I was still pregnant then go along to such n such and we'll make an appointment for such n such bla bla bla. Ok then great, thanks! The next day things were a little worse, Again I phoned the midwife in a state who managed to get me a scan for the very next day, Friday. So Friday arrives, i've had no sleep and im praying to God that im going to see my baby for the very first time. My boyfriend is with me, and after waiting for what seemed like forever we finally go into the room for unfortunately an internal examination. After some prodding around, she confirms that there's nothing in my womb, however there's alot of fluid around my adominal area, so she checks my fallopian tubes - prints off some pictures and goes to another colleague. She comes back and tells me im suffering an ectopic pregnancy and I needed to be admitted to their ward. I was in shock and terrified. I walked onto the ward to the bed and felt like it was happening to somebody else, not me. I had a drip attached to me, bloods taken, and other examinations and then I was told I needed to have an operation. By this time it was late afternoon, reality had begun to sink in, various doctors and nurses came by to talk to me, to explain things and procedures - none of which I can say I actually listened to! An anaesthetist came to me to explain the operation and to sign some papers, at this point, i was crying my eyes out, she went and came back and said 'Are you still crying!? We've just had to do the same operation on a 17yr old. She should be crying more than you' Right, gee, thanks! So had the operation, came back onto the ward - was awake all night being constantly given pain relief and having my blood pressure and temperature checked. Which was up and down all night. Morning arrived and I was allowed home. The journey home was HELL, bumps in the road, feeling nauseas. What the nurses didn't tell me was that I would experience discomfort as I had gas inside me - My god that day was horrendous, I was in alot of pain with all this gas inside me, I couldnt lay on my side because It felt like air bubbles were going through me, I was told that walking around would help shift it - bit difficult when I can hardly walk! I had to take diclofenic therefore had to eat. Couldnt eat because it made me sick. It was a vicious circle. The next few days were a blur to be honest but I had my boyfriend to help and for support and he was AMAZING !! I had to have 2 months off work (This is including the 2 weeks Christmas half term) So funds became quite tight. I have an appointment this Tuesday (10th) to see if I have healed well etc and we will talk about my future as well. Unfortunately the physical and emotional side and really drained me and seem to be experiencing fatigue, pain, aches, exhaustion every day! I wake up feeling so unrefreshed I could sleep all day and have done it as well - which leaves me feeling even more low because I have done nothing with my day and I dont feel normal. I've had to take painkillers every day which I never used to (Except when at college) and unfortunately these don't seem to be helping anymore and need stronger ones. Wow my life sucks!
So now im back at work, dreading tomorrow as it is a Monday which means full day, worried how much longer I can continue at work for but also worried that I will be penalised If I do stop work. Got to fill out a DLA form too but have no optimism on receiving that at all.
Not as chirpy as in my other blogs - sorry !!
Want to hear a joke about a pig? No!? Well that was porkward =P hehe
UPDATE !! (16/01/12)
So had my hospital appointment Tuesday - We had to wait 45 minutes, in that time me being me managed to hurt myself. In frustration at being bored I threw my head backwards and wacked it on the water fountain - OUCH !!! =( so we finally get to see the doctor who tells us everything we already knew, asked if we had any questions and that was that. Yes a whole 45minute wait for a 5 minute assessment. Brilliant!
First week back at work wasn't so bad but had a horrendous weekend - which ended up with me being in bed most of the day Sunday because I could hardly move.
Also had a doctor's appointment as I decided I wanted to come off my anti depressents which I am now taking every other day. Also got my rheamy results back, all bloods clear which is obviously good but she doesn't want to take me any further as she believes I am having physiotherapy for pacing. No idea where she got that from !! So the doctor says to me where do we go from here? How the hell do I know? Your the flipping doctor! So she's referring me to a physiotherapist.
'Let go of those who bring you down and surround yourself with those who bring the best out in you'
I had told myself I would continue to update my blog regularly - which hasn't happend seeing as the last time I did a blog was in October !! =O
Well, ALOT has happend since then - ALOT ! So, to begin with, I still have not heard back from the rheumatologist department - its now January 2012, so maybe I ought to really chase them up. It just involves a phone call which I don't like doing....Maybe I'll just get someone else to do it for me.
Secondly my hours have been cut down at work because, quite frankly, I was struggling - So i've gone from doing 18hours a week to 12hours =( Admittedly it has helped alot, as I do one full day and 2 afternoons a week, the afternoons make life so much easier as I can wake up on my own accord in the mornings. However, at first it put me in a frustrated, depressed state. Im 20 years old, therefore I should be working full time with ridiculous hours - and be allowed to complain about it. So less hours obviously means less money, less money means less retail therapy, less retail therapy means a very grumpy Francesca! In all seriousness I have bills to pay like everyone else, so I got told about Income Support, Im working under 16hours pw therefore I should be eligible right? Wrong, because Im not a single Mother nor pregnant etc im not eligible for it at all. Brilliant !! Although I got told I could apply for job seekers allowance instead, but, I have a job - a job that I love with colleagues that are understanding and caring, which I am bloody lucky for, so no, I do not want to leave my job to apply for another and be stuck somewhere making myself even more ill and hating the hell out of it, Back to square one I go.
So things get a little worse when I start suffering with sickness, headaches/migraines, my temp going up and down like a blimming yo-yo and feeling so exhausted and tired, I couldn't even get into work or they sent me home = Less Money. Yay! =( Had an inkling for quite a while and decided to pluck the courage up and get a home pregnancy test. It came up positive. I was indeed pregnant. Mixture of emotions overwhelmed me, I made an appointment at the doctors who congratulated me and gave me a prescription for folic acid and told me a midwife would contact me soon. It was worked out I was 7-8weeks gone. Wednesday I experienced some bleeding which obviously panicked and scared the hell out of me. I phoned my doctor who gave me a hospital number to ring to get in touch with a midwife who then rang me back, after explaining everything she said it was either nothing, could be normal or I was in the beginning stages of a miscarriage and to do a pregnancy test the following Monday. If I was still pregnant then go along to such n such and we'll make an appointment for such n such bla bla bla. Ok then great, thanks! The next day things were a little worse, Again I phoned the midwife in a state who managed to get me a scan for the very next day, Friday. So Friday arrives, i've had no sleep and im praying to God that im going to see my baby for the very first time. My boyfriend is with me, and after waiting for what seemed like forever we finally go into the room for unfortunately an internal examination. After some prodding around, she confirms that there's nothing in my womb, however there's alot of fluid around my adominal area, so she checks my fallopian tubes - prints off some pictures and goes to another colleague. She comes back and tells me im suffering an ectopic pregnancy and I needed to be admitted to their ward. I was in shock and terrified. I walked onto the ward to the bed and felt like it was happening to somebody else, not me. I had a drip attached to me, bloods taken, and other examinations and then I was told I needed to have an operation. By this time it was late afternoon, reality had begun to sink in, various doctors and nurses came by to talk to me, to explain things and procedures - none of which I can say I actually listened to! An anaesthetist came to me to explain the operation and to sign some papers, at this point, i was crying my eyes out, she went and came back and said 'Are you still crying!? We've just had to do the same operation on a 17yr old. She should be crying more than you' Right, gee, thanks! So had the operation, came back onto the ward - was awake all night being constantly given pain relief and having my blood pressure and temperature checked. Which was up and down all night. Morning arrived and I was allowed home. The journey home was HELL, bumps in the road, feeling nauseas. What the nurses didn't tell me was that I would experience discomfort as I had gas inside me - My god that day was horrendous, I was in alot of pain with all this gas inside me, I couldnt lay on my side because It felt like air bubbles were going through me, I was told that walking around would help shift it - bit difficult when I can hardly walk! I had to take diclofenic therefore had to eat. Couldnt eat because it made me sick. It was a vicious circle. The next few days were a blur to be honest but I had my boyfriend to help and for support and he was AMAZING !! I had to have 2 months off work (This is including the 2 weeks Christmas half term) So funds became quite tight. I have an appointment this Tuesday (10th) to see if I have healed well etc and we will talk about my future as well. Unfortunately the physical and emotional side and really drained me and seem to be experiencing fatigue, pain, aches, exhaustion every day! I wake up feeling so unrefreshed I could sleep all day and have done it as well - which leaves me feeling even more low because I have done nothing with my day and I dont feel normal. I've had to take painkillers every day which I never used to (Except when at college) and unfortunately these don't seem to be helping anymore and need stronger ones. Wow my life sucks!
So now im back at work, dreading tomorrow as it is a Monday which means full day, worried how much longer I can continue at work for but also worried that I will be penalised If I do stop work. Got to fill out a DLA form too but have no optimism on receiving that at all.
Not as chirpy as in my other blogs - sorry !!
Want to hear a joke about a pig? No!? Well that was porkward =P hehe
UPDATE !! (16/01/12)
So had my hospital appointment Tuesday - We had to wait 45 minutes, in that time me being me managed to hurt myself. In frustration at being bored I threw my head backwards and wacked it on the water fountain - OUCH !!! =( so we finally get to see the doctor who tells us everything we already knew, asked if we had any questions and that was that. Yes a whole 45minute wait for a 5 minute assessment. Brilliant!
First week back at work wasn't so bad but had a horrendous weekend - which ended up with me being in bed most of the day Sunday because I could hardly move.
Also had a doctor's appointment as I decided I wanted to come off my anti depressents which I am now taking every other day. Also got my rheamy results back, all bloods clear which is obviously good but she doesn't want to take me any further as she believes I am having physiotherapy for pacing. No idea where she got that from !! So the doctor says to me where do we go from here? How the hell do I know? Your the flipping doctor! So she's referring me to a physiotherapist.
'Let go of those who bring you down and surround yourself with those who bring the best out in you'