Oh dear - So I haven't type a blog since February =S uh oh !! Lots to catch up on then, so here goes:
So last time you heard from me, I had quit work - how has it effected me? I am a hell of lot better !!! I don't often struggle to get up in the mornings - because I can now take my time, I don't often feel the need for a nap in the afternoon - because I've taken my time to get up in the mornings. All those aches and pains - I can quite happily say I don't often experience them as much or to the extent that I did. Don't get me wrong I still do get symptoms, i'm not saying quitting work has 'cured' it but for me, it certainly has helped !! At first it was hard - having all this extra time on my hands, not knowing what to do with it, missing work like crazy and just generally having something to do, then of course money worries all the boring palava however I still don't regret it.
So saying that, let's see if I can remember what happened in March !!! Ummmmm... Maybe I should start writing down events in my diary !
Can't think of anything exciting.... Got a new phone? A blackberry 9900 Bold - yes a BLACKBERRY.... something I've always said I would never get!
Ummm, beginning to think my taste buds are going funny - I've gone off tea !! (I love tea).... Wait a minute, this happened the last time I was pregnant. Hmms? The day my period is due - can't wait much longer, no signs of it so let's do a test and low and behold 2 lines, it's a BFP !! (Big Fat Positive) What mixed emotions did I have then, thrilled but terrified !! So what next? Oh yes ended up in A&E on the 27th due to severe chest pains, it was a Costochondritis flare up due to alot of stress, as you can imagine I was petrified of the pregnancy being another ectopic ! The hospital kindly brought my appointment forward a day early - the next day. You may ask why didn't I just wait another day? It was killing me and making me ill, I needed to find out what was going on as soon as I could ! So we get home at around 1am, and Toby and I had to get up and get the train to Winchester for half past 8 ! Luckily as soon as we arrived at the department we had to be in, they called us ! 10/15mins later we find out our little bean is in the correct place !!! *phew* the relief !! Our little miracle, as apparently I ovulated from my right side (my right tube was removed) and the egg wafted over to my left side !!! Pretty amazing. So that day we took a shopping trip round Winchester and enjoyed telling our family.
So now the worrying should stop? Oh no, now I'm convinced I am going to have a miscarriage, I feel awful because I feel I can't properly be happy just yet. Every pain I experienced, I was convinced that was it - of course I know all my insides had to be moved to accommodate my growing uterus and of course the stretching of my uterus. It was all so very uncomfortable and painful.
So now we're into Mid April - I had my first midwife appointment, nothing much to say at that really - a load of paperwork being filled out ! Although I was now 8 weeks gone, 2 weeks after I saw my little bean, i'm getting flurry's off feeling excited and then immediately stopping feeling bad for having the feeling of 'just incase'
At 10 weeks we purchased a Doppler - BEST thing we've brought, relaxed the both of us, obviously reduced the stress knowing we could find and hear our baby's heartbeat whenever we wanted for reassurance. =) Best sound we have ever heard.
I've also started Job Seekers Allowance - why? Because I can't get any other help ! So with my hormones everywhere and being told I need to find a job of more than 16 hours and also to look for jobs in Southampton, Romsey, Winchester etc area as long as it doesn't exceed 90mins each way. WHAT !? So more stress and tears for me, I struggled working 12 Hours, and as for travelling to Southampton etc, I got sick doing a 5 to 10min journey up the road !!
So what now? Make a doctors appointment to get a 'fit' note to show I can't work a certain amount of hours nor travel long distance... So off I go to cry on a doctors shoulder. So explained the situation and asked politely for a fit note - she didn't get it and said she wanted to speak to my GP. *sighs* waste of time that was. According to my rheamy I haven't got Fibromyalgia and the doctor just sent me on my way - well why am I getting these random aches and pains then, she said she did the tender points and tests - SHE DIDN'T, she was running so late behind she rushed our appointment ! So with all this in mind I think it's time to change doctors to one that will listen, without timing our appointments, support and help me !! Anyway on a better note the next day, the 4th of May - my 21st big birthday !!! And my mum and stepdad treated us to a night away in Bournemouth - One of Toby and I's favourite place for different reasons. We did ALOT of walking (shopping) which killed me! But our hotel was a treat, Id love to go back and stay there, we collapsed on the bed and rested until the restaurant was open, then we headed back to the room until evening fell and took a trip along the beach - such a nice break to be away !!
Next stop is the 8th of May - our 12 week scan, anticipation - feeling quite relaxed but nervous too, what if the sound we were hearing through the doppler weren't the baby's heartbeat? Omg what if there's two !? My name gets called, I hop onto the bed and the COLD gel is squirted on my tummy.... And there it is, our baby !! A very active baby, bouncing and kicking around, waving his or hers arms, opening her mouth then jumping like she had hiccups - a real perfect magical moment for us. Also the day we got to share the news with the rest of the world!
I've noticed I've used the word 'her' a little bit - everyone seems to be convinced it's a girl, particularly my mum who has brought a load of girls clothes!! Although I'm not so sure anymore.... Maybe I should start taking bets !?
Next event- Job centre again, I've shown my personal advisor my fit note - which she cannot accept, I don't blame her. It's very vague. The reason why I can't work is due to depression, yet in the description it has nothing to do with depression. All it says in no heavy lifting or manual handling - well duh, that's pretty obvious I'm pregnant. Also says no long distance travel - well how far is far? Uh, back to the doctors I go !! Probably a good job really, I'm starting to suffer really badly with back pain and also my coccyx - I've ordered myself a coccyx cushion, it's helped a little !!
28th of May - Doctors. Went to my actual GP this time, explained about the fit note and he said he'd have to give it to the other doctor who dealt with it the first time, but yet she had to talk to him hence why I've gone to him this time round ! EURGH ! Plus side - I've got a healthworks pass thingy that allows me to get swimming half price. Hopefully that'll help my back and other parts of me !! I've noticed my knee's and ankles beginning to hurt and my hips - all the weight bearing joints. I'm only 15weeks - how am I going to cope at 30 odd weeks !? I can't walk too far either, Toby and I headed to Southampton one Saturday, half way round fatigue and pain hit me and I struggled - still am to be honest. Need a day where I do nothing, but stay in bed and read a book or something !
Inbetween everything I've enjoyed building our pond and clearing the garden the best I can. The ponds pretty much done now - we have a bigger one that holds 11 Koi fish so far, a lovely rockery with a pottery pot at the top that pours water down in and back into the pond, gravel all around the pond with a small wooden picket fence and some garden ornaments to make it look pretty too =)
Also meeting up with friends - on the days I can get out. Had a few attacks where I refuse to go out and panic at the thought ! Getting better though !
But want to thank one particular friend - someone who is there for me and understands if I can't get out one day or can't do much - Keely. So thank you !! =)
Still house hunting - getting nowhere fast !!! Today is June the 2nd the queen's jubilee - I shall do an update at the end of June, i'll try and pack in more events too! Oh also - we have two Giant African Land Snails - my pre school used to have some, i loved looking after them, unfortunately they died though so got myself my own two - they have laid over 100 eggs !! 15-20 of them have hatched and we now have some cute baby snails growing rather fast so need to find them some new homes, around 40-60 odd eggs hatching/waiting to be hatched - most may not to be honest. Some buried in the tank and one has laid another 30 odd last night/today !! Gosh, i'm glad i'm not a snail !!
But for now. thank you to those who read my blogs, I know it helps certain people - and also gives people an insight into my thoughts and life, not always something I can do, strangely in blogs I feel I can open up !!
Found this quote and thought it fitted so well at the moment and how true it is, The mind that is anxious about future events is miserable - Seneca
So last time you heard from me, I had quit work - how has it effected me? I am a hell of lot better !!! I don't often struggle to get up in the mornings - because I can now take my time, I don't often feel the need for a nap in the afternoon - because I've taken my time to get up in the mornings. All those aches and pains - I can quite happily say I don't often experience them as much or to the extent that I did. Don't get me wrong I still do get symptoms, i'm not saying quitting work has 'cured' it but for me, it certainly has helped !! At first it was hard - having all this extra time on my hands, not knowing what to do with it, missing work like crazy and just generally having something to do, then of course money worries all the boring palava however I still don't regret it.
So saying that, let's see if I can remember what happened in March !!! Ummmmm... Maybe I should start writing down events in my diary !
Can't think of anything exciting.... Got a new phone? A blackberry 9900 Bold - yes a BLACKBERRY.... something I've always said I would never get!
Ummm, beginning to think my taste buds are going funny - I've gone off tea !! (I love tea).... Wait a minute, this happened the last time I was pregnant. Hmms? The day my period is due - can't wait much longer, no signs of it so let's do a test and low and behold 2 lines, it's a BFP !! (Big Fat Positive) What mixed emotions did I have then, thrilled but terrified !! So what next? Oh yes ended up in A&E on the 27th due to severe chest pains, it was a Costochondritis flare up due to alot of stress, as you can imagine I was petrified of the pregnancy being another ectopic ! The hospital kindly brought my appointment forward a day early - the next day. You may ask why didn't I just wait another day? It was killing me and making me ill, I needed to find out what was going on as soon as I could ! So we get home at around 1am, and Toby and I had to get up and get the train to Winchester for half past 8 ! Luckily as soon as we arrived at the department we had to be in, they called us ! 10/15mins later we find out our little bean is in the correct place !!! *phew* the relief !! Our little miracle, as apparently I ovulated from my right side (my right tube was removed) and the egg wafted over to my left side !!! Pretty amazing. So that day we took a shopping trip round Winchester and enjoyed telling our family.
So now the worrying should stop? Oh no, now I'm convinced I am going to have a miscarriage, I feel awful because I feel I can't properly be happy just yet. Every pain I experienced, I was convinced that was it - of course I know all my insides had to be moved to accommodate my growing uterus and of course the stretching of my uterus. It was all so very uncomfortable and painful.
So now we're into Mid April - I had my first midwife appointment, nothing much to say at that really - a load of paperwork being filled out ! Although I was now 8 weeks gone, 2 weeks after I saw my little bean, i'm getting flurry's off feeling excited and then immediately stopping feeling bad for having the feeling of 'just incase'
At 10 weeks we purchased a Doppler - BEST thing we've brought, relaxed the both of us, obviously reduced the stress knowing we could find and hear our baby's heartbeat whenever we wanted for reassurance. =) Best sound we have ever heard.
I've also started Job Seekers Allowance - why? Because I can't get any other help ! So with my hormones everywhere and being told I need to find a job of more than 16 hours and also to look for jobs in Southampton, Romsey, Winchester etc area as long as it doesn't exceed 90mins each way. WHAT !? So more stress and tears for me, I struggled working 12 Hours, and as for travelling to Southampton etc, I got sick doing a 5 to 10min journey up the road !!
So what now? Make a doctors appointment to get a 'fit' note to show I can't work a certain amount of hours nor travel long distance... So off I go to cry on a doctors shoulder. So explained the situation and asked politely for a fit note - she didn't get it and said she wanted to speak to my GP. *sighs* waste of time that was. According to my rheamy I haven't got Fibromyalgia and the doctor just sent me on my way - well why am I getting these random aches and pains then, she said she did the tender points and tests - SHE DIDN'T, she was running so late behind she rushed our appointment ! So with all this in mind I think it's time to change doctors to one that will listen, without timing our appointments, support and help me !! Anyway on a better note the next day, the 4th of May - my 21st big birthday !!! And my mum and stepdad treated us to a night away in Bournemouth - One of Toby and I's favourite place for different reasons. We did ALOT of walking (shopping) which killed me! But our hotel was a treat, Id love to go back and stay there, we collapsed on the bed and rested until the restaurant was open, then we headed back to the room until evening fell and took a trip along the beach - such a nice break to be away !!
Next stop is the 8th of May - our 12 week scan, anticipation - feeling quite relaxed but nervous too, what if the sound we were hearing through the doppler weren't the baby's heartbeat? Omg what if there's two !? My name gets called, I hop onto the bed and the COLD gel is squirted on my tummy.... And there it is, our baby !! A very active baby, bouncing and kicking around, waving his or hers arms, opening her mouth then jumping like she had hiccups - a real perfect magical moment for us. Also the day we got to share the news with the rest of the world!
I've noticed I've used the word 'her' a little bit - everyone seems to be convinced it's a girl, particularly my mum who has brought a load of girls clothes!! Although I'm not so sure anymore.... Maybe I should start taking bets !?
Next event- Job centre again, I've shown my personal advisor my fit note - which she cannot accept, I don't blame her. It's very vague. The reason why I can't work is due to depression, yet in the description it has nothing to do with depression. All it says in no heavy lifting or manual handling - well duh, that's pretty obvious I'm pregnant. Also says no long distance travel - well how far is far? Uh, back to the doctors I go !! Probably a good job really, I'm starting to suffer really badly with back pain and also my coccyx - I've ordered myself a coccyx cushion, it's helped a little !!
28th of May - Doctors. Went to my actual GP this time, explained about the fit note and he said he'd have to give it to the other doctor who dealt with it the first time, but yet she had to talk to him hence why I've gone to him this time round ! EURGH ! Plus side - I've got a healthworks pass thingy that allows me to get swimming half price. Hopefully that'll help my back and other parts of me !! I've noticed my knee's and ankles beginning to hurt and my hips - all the weight bearing joints. I'm only 15weeks - how am I going to cope at 30 odd weeks !? I can't walk too far either, Toby and I headed to Southampton one Saturday, half way round fatigue and pain hit me and I struggled - still am to be honest. Need a day where I do nothing, but stay in bed and read a book or something !
Inbetween everything I've enjoyed building our pond and clearing the garden the best I can. The ponds pretty much done now - we have a bigger one that holds 11 Koi fish so far, a lovely rockery with a pottery pot at the top that pours water down in and back into the pond, gravel all around the pond with a small wooden picket fence and some garden ornaments to make it look pretty too =)
Also meeting up with friends - on the days I can get out. Had a few attacks where I refuse to go out and panic at the thought ! Getting better though !
But want to thank one particular friend - someone who is there for me and understands if I can't get out one day or can't do much - Keely. So thank you !! =)
Still house hunting - getting nowhere fast !!! Today is June the 2nd the queen's jubilee - I shall do an update at the end of June, i'll try and pack in more events too! Oh also - we have two Giant African Land Snails - my pre school used to have some, i loved looking after them, unfortunately they died though so got myself my own two - they have laid over 100 eggs !! 15-20 of them have hatched and we now have some cute baby snails growing rather fast so need to find them some new homes, around 40-60 odd eggs hatching/waiting to be hatched - most may not to be honest. Some buried in the tank and one has laid another 30 odd last night/today !! Gosh, i'm glad i'm not a snail !!
But for now. thank you to those who read my blogs, I know it helps certain people - and also gives people an insight into my thoughts and life, not always something I can do, strangely in blogs I feel I can open up !!
Found this quote and thought it fitted so well at the moment and how true it is, The mind that is anxious about future events is miserable - Seneca